2010/dooropen

I hate that I can leave
the door open without
worrying about the cat.

Stepping on to
our scant back porch
I’m angry that
I needn’t
worry about
the door.

Or bringing groceries
in the front.

In the last phase
of his life, he was
managed in
the house, as I
manage the weather
opening windows
at dawn, closing
them to the heat.

As the bleeding and vomiting
came, it was the
same with Evander.
Doors kept closed to
curtail the cleaning up.

You took right to it
as you do to the
cessation of any rule
leaving the dining room
door open, so we’re
exposed.

I’m bothered by
the doors more
than anything
coming and going
with all this freedom
is unsettling,
it’s not the kind
of life I’m used to
lacking reasons
for my acts.

Not having a
cat, I begin
to live like
one
coming and going
without reason.

7/15/10