First day of the year
I awoke happy.
Steam rises from the wet deck.
I sit in the strange place
where I have sat for months.
Couch three feet from the wall
it faces.
Everything crammed in the dining room
since the water damage,
four months later almost nothing is fixed.
I’ve adapted to this as life,
can no longer imagine anything else.
I guess that makes me metaphysically
at fault,
much as the door repairman here
to give a bid kept telling me
how I could do it myself.
This is some strange hell where
I can’t make out the signposts.
But it makes me want to sell
the house and leave.
Give up on a life that
has been so intractable.
Just let go.

1/1/05