2015/wrap

WRAP

I did not acquire my first wrap dress until I was sixty-eight. For the last several years fluctuations in my weight has lead me to walk my clothes up and down the stairs, moving them out of my closet on a fairly regular basis. In the last year or so my body has changed, I’ve acquired more of a tummy than I used to have and this lead to my clothes never fitting both when I was standing and sitting. I would put something on and it would fit fine but when I sat down it would be too tight, or I would try something on and it would seem too large but fit comfortably when I sat down. This must be why there are elastic waistbands I thought to myself, though I know some people want them for comfort. I was on the brink of thinking I would have to put elastic in the backs of my skirts, which truth be told I tried to do a couple of years ago as a means of altering clothes after losing weight. or resort of elastic waist skirts.
I have been in a clothes crisis, trying to understand my body, my age, how to sync who I am with who I am right now. For some time I have been trying to find clothes that are right and not quite knowing where to turn. An online article about fashion for women over sixty which showed Helen Mirren in a bikini was not all that helpful. I did agree with Rita Morena still wearing the same vibrant colors at eighty.
I’ve wondered how I will know when I look foolish and like I am trying too hard, though any woman with a daughter is pretty safe that the daughter will be quick to let her know. Since the time decades ago when I drove down the street behind a slim, long-haired blonde in jeans and when I got along side her she was decades older than you would have thought from seeing her hair from the back. I don’t believe in following a lot of arbitrary rules if they don’t really apply, but I’ve always wanted to age graciously as well as appropriately.
Desparation had driven me to contemplate a trip to South Coast Plaza, so I was looking up to see who was there. When I saw DVF I thought maybe I should check out the wrap dress. I’ve known about her signature style for as long as I can remember
I am religiously devoted to the autumnal colors, especially olive green which matches my eyes but looking at a black wrap I thought I would almost wear black to wear this dress. I found a print that seemed right for me, as a short woman with broad shoulders and a full bust this is not easy. But I was unsure what size to order. In general I find measurements in size charts have nothing to do with the reality of the garment, and the vanity sizes though good for the ego do little to give you a clear sense of what size you really are. I have been known to order two sizes to compare. I called the South Coast store and she called to find the dress for me and it was in the outlet store an hour and half away. I have always been very difficult to fit, difficult to dress because I am short, broad shouldered with a full bust. In my youth I had a very small waist, an hour glass figure. The term that seems to be applied to me now is full hour glass. I have a long waist, short legs. I have almost always had to wear separates because dresses with waist lines never fall at the right place. And that advice to wear your belt where your waist should be is pure madness to me, nothing is more uncomfortable. I developed early and all my life clothes with buttons and collars and cuffs have made me feel that I am bound and bursting out of them. At one point when I was young I wore leotards and dance wear all the time because I liked the freedom of movement and comfort and still a flattering silhouette.
So I felt the odds were not on my side that this dress would be any different. I was conflicted about making a three hour drive for a dress that might not fit at the waist. I considered going to Nordstrom to try on one in another color to see how it fit. But I was drawn to the silhouette of this dress and the print so I decided to make the drive.
I am always looking at women in movies and tv and admiring their classic sheath silhouettes, always wondering where are these clothes. Though for the most part they are dressier than what I need in my day to day life.
I was compelled by the silhouette of this dress, the v-neck I love, the three-quarter sleeve so my husband took the day off and we took a little car trip to Cabazon, where I had never been. Fortunately for me since I often get turned around in places like parking garages. I always shop alone, I rarely need help from the store staff or anyone else’s opinion. I always tell myself, remind myself that when it’s really right you know. My DVF experience was different, first of all I was a larger size because the size chart is true and usually that would have made me sad but I didn’t care. When I tried on the first dress I didn’t quite get myself wrapped in right and the girl had to redo me. I found one olive green dress, to my delight. But the print was larger than I typically wear and I felt uncertain about it as a short woman. I phoned my husband to come in and give me his opinion, something I never do. When I walked out of the dressing room another customer complimented me on how well the dress looked on me, not another woman my age but someone much younger which gave her feedback a different kind of credibility. She said it several times. I questioned whether I should be wearing something that fit my breast snugly at my age and brought that up to the employee. At first I feared the sleeves were too snug because lately I have been having trouble with sleeves being tight and uncomfortable, then I realized they fit snugly but were comfortable, as was the dress as a whole. I could sit and stand without having to adjust anything. When I sat the skirt draped graciously over my knees, it camoflaged my tummy which I have grown somewhat self-consious about. It was like this dress was sort of miraculous, doing things I couldn’t quite understand how it did them. So on the one hand I thought I don’t think I should wear this print and at the same time I was stunned at how the dress felt and functioned.
This dress is like a system of miracles, you can’t quite tell how it does what it does.
It lets you know how you have been settling, getting by. And if you are doing it in your clothes you are probably doing it in your life. It makes you feel your best, better than you had been thinking you are – you want to live better, deserve the dress – the way you have to clean the house for the bouquet. And it give you energy toward that end, puts a spring in your step.
Everyone knows clothes can make you feel fabulous, but few clothes can

I’ve had to start wearing sleeves longer.
This dress is made for me
This dress saved my life. I walked with a spring in my step, holding myself straighter, moving with more energy. It made me want to make everything in my life better. It made me want to rekindle my romance with my husband. It gave me a new lease on life.
At first I felt our usual Greek restaurant for lunch was not occasion enough for my new dress. But I didn’t want to wait for something grander at a later time. After lunch I wasn’t sure what to do next. I wanted to take my new dress to a gallery or a museum, but I had errands to do so I stopped by the drug store and the grocery and picked up the mail at the post office. It was good to know that it went into my regular life and allowed me to do the things I have to do not only feeling good about myself but comfortable as well.
Beauty is very important to me. According to …..signature strengths it is a number ten, meaning it is something that must be incorporated into my life. Astrological I have planets in Libra, the sign of love and beauty. Whether you believe any of that or not, it is a necessity of my soul. I am also a practical woman with an ordinary life, “a plain girl from the country” as I have called myself.

1/29/15