(pain)

A pain
in my back
makes it hard
for me to think.
In the heart
chakra,
I believe.
Who would be
surprised?
This is where
I’ve always
had the hardest
time.
It’s the place
I used to call
my `need ya’
where I needed
to be held.
The place my fear
lived,
when I would watch
a scarey move
& be afraid
of being stabbed
in the back.

I could never sleep
on my stomach.

My cousin said
my mother
hit me there
– well, somewhere
across the back.
It seems the likely
spot.
Though hitting
someone across
the back seems
an odd choice.
I forgot it –
we were out
& she thought I guess
doing something
we shouldn’t have
been doing.
They always seemed
to think that,
’cause I developed
young, but it was never true,
I never was.

3/6/00(what have I written like this before?)